My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

we've been together for 5 years and been married for 2 years. before me, he has an ex but they didn't really have that normal relationship because from what he used to tell me, they only talk thru phone. they never had any personal contact with each other which include holding hands, kissing, and sex per se. after that ex, he had one more ex but that's another story. anyway, i recently learned that he's been trying to communicate with the first ex. he asked his ex for her number a lot of times and asked for lunch more than twice. for the ever curious, the ex sent me a private message thru an internet social network service (e.g. myspace, friendster). the ex even stressed that my husband sometimes leave voicemail to her phone asking on why she's not picking up. the ex even told me that her sister told her that my husband called their house phone!

so my question, is this considered as cheating? what steps should i do in order to patch this?

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

absolutely 100

%

i would consider it cheating.......wouldn't your husband consider it

cheating if d roles were reversed??

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

wow, he's probably cheating on you. i mean why would he want to talk to his exes and go out to lunch with them? that's kind of strange. or maybe he's trying to be a friend you know, cause remember when some people break up, they aren't like close anymore, not friends to be exact. maybe he wants to keep the bond between them. why dont you just ask him and listen to his response.

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

she obviously wants nothing to do w/ him... yes, he's cheating... even if no physical contact w/ her... he obviously wants to start talking to her again, and that's emotional cheating... ask him to stop, and let him know if he don't stop, you will divorce, and mean it... good luck! =)

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

maybe he is missing something that you two used to do and is filling in the blanks, try and find out from the horses mouth though, these other people may be trying to cause trouble in your relationship for their own agenda entirely or maybe they are telling the truth and your relationship is in jeopardy. I would ask if it were me (providing he is not violent and you are safe, and no accusations here, I know that not all men are violent that is only a precautionary note). Also, I might run it by a good friend or therapist first, so that when I did confront him I did it in a manner that was not incorrect for the situation.

as ol' Abe said, "....all the brains I can borrow."

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

he is definitely cheating on you or propably still trying to, or how else can you explain his action.

you should confront him with your findings and see what comes out of it.

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

I think this is a case of wanting what you could have had but never did. If they never had physical contact I think he is regretting that and would like to see what it would have been like.

I think he is not actually cheating but I think he really wants to be.

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

IF he is not cheating..YET... n his ex..wont( help) he will find someone that will...there are always females looking for guys like him...good luck

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

Yes, it is cheating. He is either trying to cheat or she is. Tell him if it doesn't stop NOW you are going to be ex #3. If he says the same old line, tell him "Fine, enjoy!" and start packing. Unless they have children together or own a business together THERE IS NO REASON for them to communicate. When he said "I do" to you, it also implies "I won't" to her. Don't be his enabler for catting about. Give him an ultimatum and follow through. If he refuses to stop, you're better off without him. If he agrees, watch him like a hawk until he proves his faithfulness. Old tricks are hard to stop.

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

Your husband is trying his hardest to cheat on you. You need to make a decision. The problem is you're waiting on your husband to admit something to you with his words. He's already telling you with his actions. Stop waiting on him to admit something to you, make the decision on what you're going to do about this. Even if he's not cheating, he's disrespecting you. And that is not alright.

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

I think you should tell him that she contacted you and that obviously she doesnt think it is right that he is doing all that so he should stop. Or you could call her and be talking to her when he walks in and if he says something tell him "Why not? Your just friends"

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

he's not cheating per sa yet which is the operative word here yet, if he is trying that hard to contact her he must want something more than to say hello. The decision is yours but i would get out.

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

Before I married my husband wanted to go for coffee with one of his friends who was a female. I told him if he did that he could screw off away from me. Sounds like your hubby is fishing sweetie. Time to look at your options. Keep your mouth shut and don't tell him what you are up to. He doesn't have a problem doing it to you!!! GET OUT NOW!!! Don't wait like I did and be treated worse than the dog with a husband who was sure I'd put up with anything. Regretting that you didn't opt out sooner and wasting all those years I did on a jerk is an awful thing. Believe me....

My husband have some hidden agenda. Is this cheating?

He is definately emotionally cheating. You had better give him an ultimatum or he won't stop. You had better decide how much of this you are willing to accept. If he is not willing to stop then there is nothing that you can do to patch this up.